top of page

Centers of Trust

About Centers of Trust

Family, as the Black community, you're who we're talking about when we say Centers of Trust. Black women come to you because we initially find our food, language, music, art - ourselves. At some point, we're going to need you to help us out of or after DV (domestic violence) or other crises. That's when you need to know more about how to safely and compassionately, nonjudgmentally help us. This is not a complete list, but to give you an idea think of places like the Black church, community centers in our neighborhoods, Black-owned businesses. Then think of those people in the Black community - you know the ones - the woman who bakes the best pound cakes, or watches everybody's kids, or the man cuts everybody's grass or fixes everybody's cars. These are Centers of Trust. 

Image by Sandy Millar

What is it?

Woman Drinking Coffee

How Bad is DV for Black Women - Why Can I  Help?

Happy Pastor

Who Else Has?

Gospel Choir

What Are They Saying?

*Centers of Trust: Places Black women go because we trust and feel safe there.

Click the button below to find out

I understand you need to know that other people in our community are working with me. Click the button below to see the list

Proud to have worked with nearly 20 groups/individuals -  Click the button below to see what they had to say about me

Talks & Trainings*

*CUSTOM TRAININGS ALSO AVAILABLE!

Image by TopSphere Media

How Bad...Why Courageous?

01

DV in the US

  • Every year DV is said to impact 10 million people

  • 1 in 3 of all women have experienced DV

  • 1 in 7 women have been injured by their intimate partner

  • 1 in 10 women have been raped by their intimate partner (yes, it can be your spouse)

02

DV for Black Women in the US

  • More than 40% of Black women will experience DV in our lives

  • While 41.2% of Black women experience physical abuse, 53.8% of us experience psychological/emotional abuse (a/k/a "somebody messin' with her head" or "head games")

  • These "head games" often begin as history of control (coercive control). This history is stage 1 in the 8 stages of DV homicide. Long story short - these "head games" are often deadly

03

Why I Can Help

My work is based on the following books showcasing the work of highly respected and educated professionals I have/am studied/studying. I will continue to add to this list as my studies will be ongoing: 

  • Even though I've only been doing this work since 2019, I have been  honored to have over 50 of our Black sisters trust me to talk to and receive help from me. As I help them, I am also utilizing the information they share with me to understand our needs better. These women are from the following the states and territory: Iowa, Ohio, Missouri, Texas, New York, Florida, and Puerto Rico 

  • My most powerful gift is that I am able to take life experience and translate it into educational currency. I am a Black woman DV survivor and single mother raising 2 co-surviving daughters. I was in the relationship for 11+ years before I knew it was abuse (he wasn't hitting me), 13+ years before I began working through ending the marriage, and nearly 15 years total before the divorce was final. I saw that of the 2 groups Black women needed help from, her own community was best positioned to help her overcome certain distinct issues Black women face that white women do not. Because I am a part of our community, and now have the textbook understanding to go with my experential knowledge, I am able to bring that knowledge to us in relatable ways

  • I have also been researching through reputable online sources such as Centers for Disease Control (because DV is a health problem), National Domestic Violence Hotline, RAINN (Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network), National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, VeryWellMind.org, PsychologyToday.com, Time, Safe and Together Institute, and many other resources like the ones below: 

    • Professor Jane Monckton-Smith's work in the UK in identifying and solidifying accuracy in the 8 stages of DV homicide. Her work proves that DV homicides begin with the history of stalking and control not incidences of violence; therefore, accurate stage identification facilitates disruption in the cycle before homicide occurs

    • Dr. Hillary Potter's work in the US through interviewing 40 Black women DV survivors. Her work illuminates the stark differences between Black women in DV and other women that society deems as "real victims", as well as coins the term dynamic resistance to clarify most Black women's reaction to DV based on our different cultural influences

    • Dr. Emma Katz's work in the UK around coercive control, post DV abuse through custody and visitation, and children being co-survivors not people exposed to violence. Her work is a guide to judges, attorneys, child protective services workers, and all mandatory reporters to more accurately dissect the true dangers long past the incidents of abuse to the mother, her relationships with her co-surviving children, and the co-surviving children's relationships with one another.

Recommended Books: 

Trained With Courageous

What They Said...

Centers of Trust

"I now understand there are levels to get out of these relationships. I now understand so many of us has or will go through some sort of abuse and it's okay to seek help..."

#Permission Talks

"Filled with FEAR, I got out too. Thank you for sharing your story!"

DV Awareness Talks

“The topics are poignant, the delivery is riveting. It makes me want to be in the audience each time!”

Centers of Trust

"I'm very impressed by [your] knowledge and presentation. This is a difficult subject, yet we felt comfortable and able to share."

Centers of Trust

"This was so well done and worth my time. Thank you for making space for us and bringing us in. I look forward to working with you in the near future."

Black Woman Protector

"Thank you for your expertise in sharing this information with us. The men who came today were able to engage on this subject"

#Permission Talks

"Thank you for bringing this to light for me!"

Centers of Trust

"I enjoyed your training today, a lot of great information I have not thought of before. Thank you for sharing!"
bottom of page